It may be very important for you and your spouse or even someone in your family to seek counsel during the course of this winding journey.  There is no shame in this whatsoever.  There may be a point at which you feel like there is no one that understands you or is walking with you.  A counselor or even several intensive days of counseling may be beneficial. 
There are many types of counseling but the kind that can truly transform you is biblical counseling.  Counselors are a dime a dozen, but a biblical counselor will take effort to locate.  It will be worth your effort.  Real truth applied to real hurts brings about real change. 
We are in no way endorsing the counselors found on the below sites.  Some of the counselors that you locate via the links may not be as familiar with grief.  We highly suggest that you interview the counselor before any commitments are made between you and them.

Association of Biblical Counselors
National Association of Biblical Counselors
Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation
Twelve Stones
Respite Retreats